Cicindele

Like it or not, you’re already a tenant of my heart There are only four rooms though, so you’ll have to share And one of them is vacant, I’m saving it for someone special You were there for a while, but I kicked  you out You were pinning things to the walls and it was flaking the paint.

She takes her tea through IVs dripping her mind away Drop by drop the weight of past pains fades away It smells of potpourri burnt and strapped to her face The smell of people Too many Suffocating anxiety Still left her when right was wrong But stuck Her insides squirming in transversal lines Crossing and twisting Shoved into closets in her mind and left to fester Like autumn leaves Paving the path for new demons New pain Messed in a shadow of her passed self leaving a trail of bitter sweet sugars.

Les coutures tiennent pu Ça tire, ça pousse, ça mord, C’est sauvage là-dedans Sans les coutures c’est finit.

They tell me I’m solid A Rock. An inspiration Standing up unphased Always And I believed it Strong In control But winds are strong Insidious You don’t notice the erosion Until everything starts seeping from the cracks. Winds eroding Cracks running Soft leaking Repeat.

I’m made of understanding Don’t cry too much you’ll dry yourself up Or drown your loved ones.

The silence is so unsettling She can’t tell if it’s coming from outside Or inside Her head Cloudless sky Such a weird shade of blue The lack of wind Not a leave bristling All she can hear is the sound of  her living.

Le vrai et le faux La raison et la folie La réalité et l’illusion Le rationnel et l’irrationnel. Un éternel clash des titans Dans sa tête, Dans ses mots Sur son corps Essayer de comprendre, ou du moins calmer Le combat interne Qui épuise Qui fait mal Qui prend toute la place Question d’avoir finalement un coin tranquille où dormir.

Compact compact compact Like cubes rubbing together, grinding Movement is impossible, everything is solid, tangible. A move in reverse Like a flower, compact, condensed and violent at the start And then unravels, relieves, soothes Everything leads back to loops The loop is a spiral A never ending horror Everything fades into another, blending Pushing my cubic fist through the cubic air is too difficult Everything is too tight I don’t want to do that anymore. Any of it.